macado's se asia adventure I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.


You better Belize it: Belikin beer and hookers

Slept in late and went to The Baker shop to use their free wireless connection. I was tired from a combination of the ferry and ADO bus so I didn't stay out late last night and crashed around 10pm. Last night we went to a small little palapa bar called BC's. A great little bar on the beach. One of the bartenders Ernie is a pretty nice and funny guy too.

I spent the entire morning walking around the island and taking some pictures. I'm guessing I looked pretty desperate because I was offered weed by every single Rastarian on the beach about five times. I also decided that I was well overdue for a run so I figured now was as good a time if anyway. This was a bad decision on my part; 85 degrees and 70-80% humidity makes for a completely miserable run. I only managed about 4.5 Miles before the dust, sun, and humidity got to me. Dodging golf carts driven by drunken tourists and and equally high locals on bicycles also doesn't not help either.

Coincidentally Mark whom I had left in Cozumel, Mexico the day before had emailed me and said he had gotten sick of Cozumel and was on his way to Caye Caulker, Belize which is where I originally told him I would be. Thankfully he told me what flight he was on so I knew his plane was landing in about 20 minutes. Since Ambergris Caye is a small island I literally walked over to the airport and onto the runway and decided to meet Mark so he would know where I was otherwise he would have made it all the way to Caye Caulker only to find out I wasnt there yet. Pretty sure he was a bit surprised to see me.

I figured I would stay another night in Ambergris before heading to Caye Caulker for some diving and partying for the New Years. Mark had procured a room at place called Spindrift Hotel for 175 Belize dollars (about 85 USD). A little too rich for my blood but he also had air conditioning and his hotel was not made of plywood. Much nicer than that cheap little shanty that me and Bart were staying in but for 15 bucks I cant complain.

I figured now was a good time if any to start some heavy power drinking since I wasnt diving tomorrow. Rendezvoused with Bart at BC's around 3:30pm and introduced old Markie to Bart. Mark was a bit tired so he went back to back to his hotel to crash for a few hours. 5 hours later I was still sitting in the same bar stool where he left me. Estimated that I drank just shy of a 24 pack that night. I'm guessing Bart had a very similar amount and smoked enough cigarettes to kill a small child. Bart had been going on and on about the burritos at BC's so I decided to tempt fate and get some solid nourishment and soak up some alcohol. Bart was correct; the burritos at BC's for 5 Belize dollars were well worth it.

Fast forward many hours and Belikin beers later. Mark decided to crash and me and Bart continued onto a club called the Tackle Box which is located on a pier on the the waterfront. This is where the story gets very interesting. There are always some stories that you wish you could remember every minute detail; Unfortunately this isn't one of them. My brain and corneas are now forever permanently scarred.

Enter two girls and I use that term very loosely came up to me and Bart at the bar. One was a very large and grotesque local girl baring a very good resemblance to Aunt Jemima. The other one looked like a malnourished, poverty striken crackhead. The latter taking a very keen interest in Bart or was it that other way around?

I wasn't really feeling this scene. I was being accosted by every single local Belizean asking me to buy them drinks. I met a very friendly and sociable drug dealer who also claimed business was slow and also wanted me to buy him a drink.

Unfortunately for him I had no interest in buying from him nor buying him anything. I skipped out and decided to hit up one of the local carts for some street food. Ordered a cheese burger for about 4 Belizean dollars. Guessing it was around midnight. I stopped in one last bar on the beach for another beer and decided to call it a night.

As I proceeded to return to my hotel room after a long night of drinking I noticed that the door to the room was slightly ajar. From here I witnessed something that no human being should ever be witnessed to. It seems my new friend Bart had decided to secure the services of a local provider and I had just walked in on the end of their business transaction. I'll leave the rest of the details to your sick and sad imagination.

I decided to go down to my friend Mark's hotel and crash there for the night. Unfortunately the security guard would not let me in nor would he go up to Mark's room and wake him. I chilled out for about an hour before returning to my room when I was sure his guest of honor was gone; Thankfully I was correct.

Next morning when I woke up to find my new friend was long gone to catch the 7AM ferry off to continue his raunchy adventures however my adventure still continues....Next up Belizean karaoke, poker machines and finding old and new friends.

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